Star Wars: The Old Republic Tatooine Smuggler

Dearest SWTOR,

I don’t really know how to say this without hurting your feelings, so I’ll just say it. I’m kind of mad at you. I’m sure it’s just a phase. I’ll get over it in time.

But, really. Why must you insist on enveloping my entire life?

Do you have to be so amazingly fun that I have spent time with no one but you all week?

I’m pretty sure that none of this is my fault. I had a feeling you might be decent back when I first heard about you this summer. I was intrigued by your companion system and the potential to try out Huttball. And, you were getting rid of the auto attack crutch. I was impressed by your ingenuity and eager for a taste.

Once I was awarded that taste, however, I found my mouth burned. You were so wonderfully delicious at first during the beta. But then my characters were ripped away from me, exiled by the beta wipe process. I never thought I’d enjoy a Smuggler, but now I faced re-creating the now-kindred soul that I’d lost.

Zayn has finally gotten to ride through the deserts of Tatooine on her Collector’s Edition STAP mount. She has met new companions on her journey to hunt down the man who so very much wronged her on that first day in Ord Mantell. Zayn has found new life in early access, and I love that you have given us this time anew, SWTOR.

But with Zayn already being just one level above 30, I fear that I am spending too much time with you. You are charming and dangerous, like a poisoned apple. The real challenge that you present to me is fine-tuning my priorities.

If it weren’t for your compelling story arcs and entertaining combat, I’m sure I could quit you easily. Well, assuming you didn’t have the Smuggler’s cover mechanic, waifish Mirialans, adorable blasters, witty comebacks — okay, this list could go on for a while. Let’s just say I could totally quit you if you sucked.

But, since you don’t suck, I’m addicted to you. And I want more of you. I hope you’re prepared for needy because, SWTOR, I didn’t know what I was missing until I found you.

Lots of love,

P.S. Don’t worry. I don’t want to quit you. I don’t want to quit you even one little bit.


About Amanda

Amanda is a 20-something flailing gamer. While she loves MMORPGs, the company in them often triggers flare-ups of her social anxiety. Her all-time favorite games include Everquest Online Adventures, Eternal Sonata, the Animal Crossing series, Katamari Damacy, and Rhapsody: A Musical Adventure. She lives on junk food, and her favorite books are equally trashy. She doesn't believe in putting two spaces after a period, but she does strongly believe in the serial comma. Unfortunately, she has a penchant for starting sentences with "and" and "but;" hopefully you won't hold that, or her excessive use of semicolons, against her.

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